Self-Growth or Self-Improvement?
Hi I'm Liz Moser, a Mayo Clinic and National Board Certified Health and Wellness Coach and as promised, this blog post is based on a homework journaling assignment my new coach gave me.
She asked:
What is the result of and the point of the engine of self-growth and self-improvement?
Great question, right?
As I was answering this question, the first process I went through was to make a distinction between self-growth and self-improvement.
I see Self-growth as a reflection of curiosity and lifelong learning: it comes from a positive place of self-acceptance and self-care to live and express our authentic selves and life purpose more effectively. Which, for me, is coaching, mentoring, and simply being there for other people. Also, self-growth can be enjoyable, right? You can take a class, learn something new, only because you are curious about the topic and it’s fun and that can be considered self-growth as well.
Therefore, self-growth is an action that brings you closer to your most actualized self or activities that allow you to express your purpose more effortlessly, and anything that brings joy and fun.
On the other hand, Self-improvement has a connotation of not being quite perfect enough and then feeling the need to improve ourselves so that we’re worthier of love, acceptance, friendship, respect…fill in the blank.
Self-improvement can be a toxic way to keep us from expressing our true selves. It's a false goal that makes us feel "busy" and "productive."
I often think, and write about creating habits in general, and my specific habits and routines. Given my definitions of self-growth and self-improvement, which of the actions are self-growth and which for self-improvement? Am I busy self-improving, or are my actions self-growth, and why do I care?
Well, It matters because we don’t want to spend our lives on a hamster wheel of It’s never enough, and we’re never enough. The goal is to live a life of purposeful action, joy, and connection, not one where we are nitpicking and tweaking in an attempt to self-improve.
Yes, our mental, physical and spiritual bodies need tending, or they atrophy. We need a healthy body, mind, and spirit to live our purpose each day and to play and experience fun and joy. Ultimately, that’s what our daily habits should be about, caring for our bodies, minds, and spirits. Meanwhile, we need to watch any tendency we may have to want better and better; more and more.
What also came to mind as I was journaling on this question was my blog about wanting to accrue rewards points so I could “win” at my yoga studio. Achieving goals can be fun and motivating, but keeping an eye on the goals and the actions are necessary. Asking ourselves, when is it enough, while staying grounded in the point of the goal. The why of the goal.
Is the achievement of the action for merely bragging rights, or are they an engine of self-growth allowing us to live a more fun, joyful self-actualized life? Speaking personally, am I trying to win the world's most disciplined middle-aged lady? Ha! Not much point in that, if I am not also experiencing joy while living my life purpose.
In sum, I am inviting you to take a look at your health and wellness goals and your current habits and ask yourself what your motivator is. Are you motivated by self-growth or self-improvement?
Are you coming from a place of wanting to more efficiently and effectively live and express your passions and life purpose, or are you coming from a place of looking to fix or fill a deficiency?
And
How do your habits and routines support you in fulfilling your life purpose, and how do they add peace and joy to your life?
I’m Liz Moser, a Mayo Clinic and National Board Certified Health and Wellness Coach and I hope you have a week where you joyfully connect with your life goals and purpose.
Bye for now and be well! Liz
